In | Me and Mine Project #27

December 2018

The end of another month and even more scarily, another year! December got off to a heartwarming start as Ivy starred as Mary(!) in her first ever Nativity but sadly that was to be the end of school for the year for us as illness struck and we were desperate to get her well enough for Christmas. I have to admit I enjoyed the down time with the babies at home doing Christmas sticker books and cooking gingerbread Christmas trees, Ivy writing all of her own cards this year and the times in which we have been out, it's been all four of us which I have adored. Despite all the festive fun (which I have really loved!), I really struggled to get into the spirit of it all this year and it didn't quite feel as exciting as it has in recent years - I don't think I could quite believe it was really December once again as the year has really just gone in the blink of an eye and I probably managed to kill the season before it had even began by completing the shopping before October - oops. All I do know is, even without feeling christmassy, spending all that precious time with all the people in my life I love more than anything couldn't have been more perfect and I am so very lucky to have every single one of them.

Overall, 2018 was one of those wonderful years that didn't need any of those mega life-changing moments to make it a memorable one. No new home, new babies, engagements, weddings, extravagant holidays - instead all those small victories added up to a 365 chapter that I'm not trying to forget in a hurry. This time last year, all I had wished and wanted from 2018 was for Ivy to get better and by some way of a miracle she did and I couldn't be more grateful for that and now, at the tail end of the year, I am even more grateful that my mum is also here and well after a hideous encounter with the big C this year. The year has naturally had it's ups and it's downs but ultimately there has been plenty to smile about and I am very much the kind of person that will remember the great heatwave and World Cup success of 2018 rather than the state brexit has left the country in.

The other thing that I can look back on 2018 with a small amount of pride is the changes I have made to myself as a person. I vowed to go a lot greener with my lifestyle choices which I feel I have made many positive steps towards that and have plenty of ways I want to improve in the new year too. On a much more personal level, I have started to really understand the benefit that just the smallest amounts of self-care can not only bring me, but my family too. It is not something I have discussed on here for various reasons but my mental health has not been great for a long while and in the last couple of months (and I'm sure Michael will agree), I have started to see some light at the end of the tunnel which I can only hope that continues into 2019. I'm still surviving on minimal sleep thanks to my dear son but I have finally accepted that I really cannot pour from an empty cup anymore and as much as I'd like to try and see the sunshine through the clouds most days, I need to allow myself time to feel all those other things too.

I hope anyone who may be reading is going into the new year with as much optimism as we are and that you all enjoy a very happy and healthy 2019 x